Indian wedding is globally acknowledged & synonymized as an affair of mockery and a spend-a-thon which exemplifies grandeur, beeline of rituals (mostly the ones which have no logic except the element of auspiciousness they offer as per the retired members of the family), unnecessary invitees who make sure to go to the bride & groom to say “beta pechana” & moronic food menu where the couple’s parents feel proud as if they are feeding poor’s from the entire world. Globally wedding day is perceived to be the most special day for the couple, but surprisingly in India, it’s the most special day for array of people who keep dreaming about this day for their entire life. The most bizarre part of their dream is the fact that all of them, except the bride & groom, unanimously dream about this day as an event which will give them an opportunity to showcase their real wealth to the entire world, the day when hardly known people with fake smile will come to them to praise for the decoration, food menu, location of the venue & expensive gifts which have to surely surpass the standards set in previous weddings and be considered as the new benchmark for the upcoming weddings in the family.
In the mumbo-jumbo process of an Indian wedding, every illogical thing has a hierarchy
of gratification for the close family members of the couple i.e. more the level
of weirdness, higher the amount of bragging/gratification for them. If the
wedding is at an exuberant five star hotel, which majority of the friends, kith
and kins of the host family can’t afford or the food menu is so huge that it
was not even possible for the invitees to vouch for the list of items or the
decoration is gushingly so catchy that everyone has their eyes wide open, then
that tantamounts to fulfilling of the real dream to the core. In reality, the
most crucial aspect of a wedding i.e. the lovely couple embarking a beautiful
journey takes the backseat. No one cares what the bride & groom have to go
through with the most heavy costumes they have ever worn, with hundreds of eyes
staring at them and making stupid comments/judgments (this girl could have got married to anyone then why this boy, boy must
be super rich, girl’s height is at par with boy-wish boy was little taller,
bride’s mom is not wearing jewellery in commensurate with the occasion etc.)
and last but not least the irritating photographers who are entrusted with the
responsibility of creating artificial memories of the event by taking pics of
the couple with some predefined poses, for the invitees when they are having
dinner and for the adolescents who are lined up next so that these pics can be
used as their proposal pic.
In this entire
circus, bride & groom are as perplexed as a baby in a dance bar. All that
they have dreamt of this day disappears when they see the crazy crowd and unable to
identify most of them but at the same time their parents are going gaga over the
huge footfall as if the crowd has congregated to congratulate them for their astounding achievement. Throughout the wedding procession the couple keep
wondering whether the feeling that they are experiencing is the real one which
everyone goes through or its happening only to them. They are in such an
obfuscated state of mind that they find it difficult to decipher that the
feeling is actually the best one which they have ever experienced or they have to simply smile throughout for everyone without actually being so happy. They can see their group of friends having a gala time but can’t join
them. They see their close relatives and loved ones connecting and gossiping but they can just be the spectators.
Pragmatically how is it possible
that unanimously the only memory that a couple has for their wedding day is
feeling of drowsiness, nervousness (as
lot of unknown people were staring continuously, as to whether or not they were
behaving as per standards set by the society, whether some awkward moments were captured by the photographer), being famished for long hours and seeing
the entire world gobbling like a wild animal. The worst memory of any wedding
is the reception where the couple is showcased to the entire world and the real
net worth of two families can be assessed by glancing around bride’s neck, ears
and hands. Every tom, dick and harry wants to get themselves clicked with the
couple (obviously in a predefined pose)
so that they can stamp their presence and may make it to the wedding album as
well. The couple has to play the statue game for around 3 hours waiting for
that one eureka moment when someone will come and say “give them a break of 2
minutes”, “let them eat something” or “at least let them breathe”.
With passage of
time, there are few cases where this imprudent format is completely abolished
and an attempt is made to infuse an element of austerity & pragmatism.
However, there is no dearth of morons who are still vying to make this event
better and bigger than it has ever been conceived. It’s high time for all of us
to introspect the importance of showing off the wealth we have generated in
decades to the bunch of irrelevant people vis-à-vis the hard earned money being
used for a quality life of the couple who have kick started their journey. No
matter how much you splurge and take care of minutest possible thing there are
few jealous idiots in each family to crib, curse, comment and coil up simple
things to the embarrassment of host family. We need to redefine the
domain of eligibility of our earnings i.e. society or the couple who are our
own blood. It is impossible to rationalize and justify the irrational spending
at the cost of being indebted for the rest of the life. So let it be an event of wedding and avoid making it an event of
shedding.
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